Funny Stuff Out of Someone Else's Mouth

A church in Memphis has erected a five-story Statue of Liberty, but instead of holding her torch, she's got a crucfix. That doesn't make any sense, but if a five-story vampire comes at these people, they are so covered.
-- Bill Maher

I'm from Jersey, so I don't take any crap from a cat.
-- Victor Sandonato, who now lives in Utah, after learning that Lewis -- an infamous Connecticut cat that has reportedly attacked a least a half-dozen people -- might be moving to a nearby animal sanctuary.

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