A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...

It was 32 years ago today...

With immense respect for McCartney & Lennon, it wasn't Sgt. Pepper who taught the band to play, at least today.

It was George Lucas.

May 25, 1977. On this very date, Star Wars made its debut in theatres. And changed the face of cinema forever.

Cut to a conversation on a "play date" with several families at a private beach club several weeks later My friend Rachel and I and a couple of other girls whose names escape me at the moment were bobbing in the water, trying to stay away from our pesky younger brothers and talking about the things 12-year-old girls talk about.

Boys.

Boys.

Boys.

The conversation turned to what movies we had seen or were going to see or didn't want to see. In those days, before the advent of cable telly and the internet and such, going to the movies was THE big thing to do. Actually, it was pretty much the only thing to do that didn't involve sweating outside (putt-putt golf or the local pool.) Hanging out at the mall wasn't what my crowd did in those days -- that was considered tacky. Why I don't know. But there you are.

Of course, we'd all seen Star Wars. Multiple times (again, something that was the "thing" to do.) And while my galpals were all swooning over Mark Hamil and how "dreamy" he was, I was more concerned with the considerable charms and swagger of Harrison Ford. Which included his chest hair.

Leave it to me to be the odd woman out in that discussion.

But I digress.

I'm a self-proclaimed Not a Geek. Especially in the sci-fi area of pop culture. But even I have been bewitched by the myth and message of Star Wars. The original three, anyway.

Good versus evil.

Coming of age.

Teamwork.

A strong female role model.

And a damn good story.

All there. It still holds up. Even after all these years. And it's still bewitching generations of wide-eyed movie watchers. One of my Choir Urchins, age 6, is one of the biggest Star Wars fans I know. Right down to his dancing like Darth Vader during Freeze Dance time and saying a Star Wars prayer before we ate our end-of-the-year cupcakes.

I'm gonna see if I can find a showing of it on the telly today -- shouldn't be too difficult, since it seems like it's shown constantly on some channel or the other. Constantly. Won't have quite the same effect as seeing it on the big screen, but you know, that really doesn't matter. The story's the thing. As well as Harrison Ford's tight pants. And chest hair.

May the Force be with y'all.

You Have The Right...

I have a very diverse sense of humor. Very diverse.

OK, let's be honest. It's quirky.

There's no telling what's gonna make me laugh. Either at an appropriate or inappropriate time. I have the curse of the giggles.

These crazy-ass mug shots make me laugh out loud like nothing else. Even though I've seen them all more times than I can count. I think it's all about the hair. My funny-bone weakness is hilarious hair. Which gives me an idea for another pictorial post somewhere down the line, so I'll save my commentary for then.

I'm snickering even as I write this. And then coughing, because my #($&^# cold is still in residence.

Anyhoo.

Enjoy. I know I am.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!



BWAAAHAHAHAHA!



My personal favorite:

Tell your gay mom thanks for the flowers!

My life is set to get a whole lot better tonight about 8:29 pm EDT.

New episodes of 30 Rock hit the airwaves at that time.

And I am giddy with anticipation.

I will probably wax poetically in the 'morrow about it (the episode is entitled "MILF Island" -- c'mon. How can I not love something with that moniker...) but until then, here's a snippet of goodness to either tide you over or get you acquainted with the genius of this program.



PS: This is brilliant, but embedding is a no-no. Go watch anyway. There'll be a quiz later... so I'll know if you actually tuned in:
Great Moments from 30 Rock. Seriously.

PPS: Never go with a hippie to a second location.

A Moment... A Good Moment

My cynical, snarky heart was put to the test last night during American Idol's big phianthropic extravaganza, Idol Gives Back. With testimony after testimony focusing on the heart-wrenching needs of people around the world juxtaposed with production numbers and sparkle, it was alternately touching and bizarre.

My DVR cut out before the end number, so I didn't get a chance to see the big finish until now. And I'm glad I did. Color this church-goin' girl surprised to hear her favorite praise song, "Shout to the Lord". Rather cool, actually. Sure, the words were changed a bit for the telecast to make things a little more globally appropriate. I get it and totally understand -- and applaud this change. But as far as an inspirational song goes, you won't find a better one. At least not in my book.

PS: My AI boyfriend, one David Cook, is amazing in this...

Lights. Camera. Action!

Film is one of the three universal languages, the other two: mathematics and music.
~ Frank Capra

My pal Wildhair inspired me to throw this post together with her Movie Madness Meme. I poached the questions from her blog and combined them with a set of movie-related queries I've had hanging around for a while. It's a turbo cinema-fest! Enjoy!

The first movie that made you cry:
Gone With the Wind. I cannot even remember how old I was when I first saw this movie -- suffice it to say that I was very young, as I consider this film part of me. When Scarlett’s mama died; Mammy’s amazing scene with Rhett after the death of Bonnie Blue; when Melanie dies; when Rhett leaves Scarlett. All tear-inducing, even as a young girl.

The movie that everyone else seems to love, but you do not:
Forrest Gump. Heresy, I know. I find it saccharine, simplistic and slightly pandering. It grates. Yes, I’m a curmudgeon when it comes to this film. Plus I’m still mad that it won the Oscar over Pulp Fiction.


The movie that you'll watch over and over:
This Is Spinal Tap. I have watched this more times than I can remember. And I don't see that pattern stopping anytime. Ever. Love it beyond all reason. It's brilliant in its satire but also stands on its own as a pretty damn funny movie. Here's a trailer that sums it all up beautifully:





The movie you're happy you saw in the theater:
Have a couple. Gone With The Wind was one -- to see the full effect on the big screen of the sweeping expanse of the cinematography, especially in the Atlanta scenes -- war dead and wounded plus burning of Atlanta was phenomenal. I saw this on the big screen a couple of times, back when there was such a thing as individually owned movie theatres and the showings of true classic films in them was a regular occurrence.

And Song of the South is another -- the 1940s era Disney flick about the stories of folk figure Uncle Remus. I actually saw this with my parents when I was in my early twenties -- it was released for a limited engagement in theatres and they insisted on taking me. If you look at the movie head-on with the eyes of today, it does smack of stereotypes and what might be construed as political incorrectness. But so did many of the films of that era. The combination of animation and live-action was groundbreaking for the time in which it was made and Uncle Remus (the great and sadly underrated James Baskett) was not only a master storyteller but the epitome of charm and kindness. The real reason, though, that I’m glad to have seen this in the theatre is the fact that it meant a lot to my parents. You won’t find any two more tolerant and open-minded people in their generation than my folks -- but this film was a part of both their childhoods. They loved it and wanted to share it with me. And I’m glad I got to have that experience in the theatre.

The movie that scares you the most:
I’m not much for scary movies. At all. I guess I'd have to say Halloween, I suppose, because it’s the first R-rated movie I saw in a theatre (and I was only 14 -- how daring!) and I remember it scaring the heck out of me.

The movie in which you love all the characters:
While You Were Sleeping. Sandra Bullock. Bill Pullman. Peter Gallagher. Peter Gallagher’s Eyebrows (they took acting lessons from Joan Crawford’s Eyebrows and do a stellar job in this film.)

It’s a frothy little romantic comedy that I adore -- and every character, right down to the supporting cast, is wonderful. I especially love the character of Joe Jr, played with swarthy dim-witted egocentricism by Michael Rispoli. It’s another one of those movies that if I come across it while channel-surfing, I must stop and watch.

Your favorite kids’ movie:
The Jungle Book. It’s fun. It’s funny. It’s held up really well. And it’s got GREAT music. What more could a person want, I ask you?

Your favorite black and white film:
Tough one. So many to choose from... I’m very partial to the screwball comedies of the ‘30s-’50s. Given that, I’ve gotta go with Some Like It Hot. Jack Lemmon. Tony Curtis. Marilyn Monroe, in my favorite role of hers. Directed by Billy Wilder. Funny -- not just tee-hee funny, but laugh out loud funny; smart and sexy.

High on the list of my favorite movie scenes of all time is the final one of this flick... check it out:


The movie you love that you might be embarrassed to admit:
Dying Young. It’s schlock. It’s got a predictable plot and hackneyed dialogue. It’s got a score by Kenny G. But I love it nonetheless. I cry, I laugh, I swoon over Campbell Scott. And I’ll stop and watch it whenever I catch a glimpse of it on the telly.

Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times:
This Is Spinal Tap. While You Were Sleeping. So I Married an Axe Murderer. Pillow Talk. Gone With the Wind. Singing In the Rain. Amadeus. Grease. The Sound of Music.

I’ll stop now.

Name a movie that you've seen multiple times in the theater:
Amadeus. Dangerous Liaisons. St. Elmo’s Fire. Grease. Working Girl.

I’ll stop now.

Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie:
George. Clooney. Duh.

Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie:
Tom. Cruise.

Name a movie that you can and do quote from:
This Is Spinal Tap. “It goes to eleven” and "There's a thin line between stupid and clever" get A LOT of play in my vernacular. Oh! So I Married An Axe Murderer, too. Always quoting that one. "Wow, you've turned into a right sexy wee bastard. Do you know that? " "Come, let us dance like children of the night!"

I'll stop now.

There are more, but these two are my go-to quotables.


Name a movie musical from which you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs:
The Sound of Music. Singing in the Rain. Grease. Mame (horrible movie -- Lucille Ball was so miscast -- but I know all the songs.) Hello Dolly! (horrible movie -- Barbra Streisand was so miscast -- but I know all the songs.) High Society.

I’ll stop now.

Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with:
See above.

Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see:
Singing In the Rain. Probably the quintessential movie musical. A lush, sumptuous Technicolor vision, it’s got charm in spades. Great music, classic dancing (it’s worth a view just for the title song alone, but there are many more hoofing delights to see) and a fun look at early Hollywood. It’s a picture that even those who turn their nose up at musicals say they like.


Name a movie that you own:
Don’t even know where to start. I’ve just begun the cataloging process and my little dent has tallied up to 56 DVDs. That does include TV series on DVD, though. But I’d wager that I own upwards of 200 movies. I’ll keep you posted.


Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops:
Cher. From Sonny's sidekick to Oscar winner. She's awesome.

Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? If so, what?
Oh, heck yeah. It was not unusual for my parents to put my brother and me in our pajamas, toss us in the backseat of the car with our blankets, pillows and stuffed animals and head to the drive in for an evening out. We slept. They got to see a first-run movie. Good times.

When I was older, the drive-in was still around but was fast becoming a lost commodity. I remember seeing Porky's on a date and Big on a girls-night-out. Last movie I saw at a drive-in: Beavis and Butthead Do America. I fell asleep. Thus my drive-in experience went full circle.

Check this out... a retro drive-in intermission countdown, shown between the flicks of a double feature.


Ever made out in a movie?
Heck yeah. There were many movies during the summer of ‘82 of which I missed large plot points, thanks to a hot new relationship.

Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven’t yet gotten around to it.
An Inconvenient Truth. Bad liberal! Bad liberal!

Ever walked out of a movie?
Once. A Midsummer Night’s Sex Comedy. But that was not so much about the movie as it was about the fact that my boyfriend and I wanted to go do some serious making out. I was 17 with ripe hormones. Go figure.

Popcorn?
A small one. Coupled with milk duds. And a real coke.


How often do you go to the movies (as opposed to renting them or watching them at home)?
Does never count as an answer? All my movie viewing these days is done at home. Or on my iPod.

Last movie you saw in the theater:
I had to think about this one. Casanova, with Heath Ledger and Sienna Miller. Yes, it’s been that long.

Favorite/preferred genre of movie:
Comedy. Screwball. Romantic. Satire. Frat/Dude. You name it. If I can laugh, I love it.

First movie you remember seeing in the theater:
The Love Bug. Original recipe. I loved all those Disney movies of the '60s and '70s. There was a wit and sense of earnestness about them. And they all featured a cavalcade of stars that I'd seen on many a sitcom or game show: Joe Flynn (McHale's Navy!) Keenan Wynn. Buddy Hackett. Cesar Romero (The original Joker!). Hayden Rorke (Dr. Bellows!) Wally Cox (Underdog!) Dean Jones. Kurt Russell. Don Knotts. Good stuff.

Movie you wish you had never seen:
You know, I can’t even think of one. It must have been so bad that I blocked it out.

Weirdest movie you enjoyed:
Magnolia. More than slightly existential, it totally appealed to the lapsed English graduate student in me and baffled everyone else I saw it with. Might be time for a rewatch of this one...


Funniest movie you've seen:
Aside from Some Like It Hot and This Is Spinal Tap, I must say What’s Up Doc?, the underrated Barbra Streisand/Ryan O’Neal vehicle from the early 1970s. Directed by Peter Bogdonovich and featuring great performances from Madeline Kahn, Austin Pendleton and Kenneth Mars, it’s a screwball delight. And I laugh every single time I watch it, even though I know exactly what’s coming.

Your favorite movie of all time:
I don’t have only one. Cannot even begin to narrow it down. I simply love cinema.

Cinema should make you forget you are sitting in a theater.
~Roman Polanski

Best. Time Waster. Ever.

I give you the two funniest videos I think I've seen in a long, long, long time.

WARNING: TOTALLY NSFW. 

But worth the watch when you can.

First, the one that started it all: Sarah Silverman on her boyfriend Jimmy Kimmel's late night show.


And then, last night, Jimmy countered with his rebuttal.

Enjoy. And try not to hack up a lung laughing while you do, like I did. HAHAHAHAHA!

Duh.

How is it that I never realized until RIGHT NOW that Mick Jagger sings backup on Carly Simon's seminal "You're So Vain."

I'm listening to my Singer/Songwriter playlist on iTunes -- "You're So Vain" comes on and there, clear as a bell, is Mick's voice on the chorus.

Duh.

Wonder if this means that the song is really about Warren Beatty? Or if it's really meta to have Mick singing on a song about him?

Hmmm. That's making my head hurt. Time for caffeine and a NutriBreakfast. Then I'll ponder this some more.

It's going to be one of those days.

My Life On Screen

All television is children's television.
~ Richard P. Adler

Television and I have been likethis since I was knee-high to Inch High Private Eye and Phyllis Diller had yet to have her first face lift. Yeah, it's been a long time.

The phrase "before my time" has no meaning to me in regards to television (or actually, to most things, thanks to my sharp curiosity and voracious reading habit), as I grew up watching reruns of shows produced well before my natal day. Still do.

So it probably will come as no surprise that my childish yet fertile imagination ran wild with the creative possibilities of television. Some kids were dealing with imaginary friends and the nuances of playing Cops and Robbers. Me -- I was figuring out which sitcom characters reminded me of members of my family.

Did you ever think about life as a metaphor for television?
~ Chuck Palahniuk


Exhibit A: My Nana and what I saw as a physical resemblance to Endora from Bewitched. (aka Agnes Moorehead). Same dyed reddish hair. Same twinkle in the eye. Nana never did wear caftans or that fab blue eyeshadow that were Endora trademarks -- but nonetheless, my six-year-old self still saw a likeness.

Exhibit B: My Daddy Pete (maternal grandfather) and Ricky Ricardo (Desi Arnaz, of course!).

I never knew my Daddy Pete -- he died when my mama was only five years old. Dropped dead of a heart attack while shaving. As she was so very young, all I really know about him is from pictures and family epherma. He was a Spanish teacher at the local junior college. In the Navy Reserves. Had a wicked sense of humor. And was a dashing, handsome fellow. He and Nana spent quite a bit of time in Havana before Mama was born -- back in the days when a trip to Cuba for the weekend took no time at all from Florida.

So I think that when I tried to conjure up an image of Daddy Pete, I gravitated towards the closest relatable persona -- Ricky Ricardo. A dashing Cuban with a wicked sense of humor and an infectious smile.

This may seem rather weird (hell, it seems weird to me), but it gives me a strange sense of comfort. Even though I never had Daddy Pete as an active part of my life, I did have Ricky Ricardo. And my nana is long gone from this world -- so a glimpse of Endora gives me a visual image of her instantly.

And it works for me. Which is all that matters.

By the way, I did this same thing with my parents. I'll just give you the visual of their television counterparts -- which should come as no surprise...



Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover.
~Homer Simpson

The Envelope Please...

My college roommate, the Divine Miss L., is once again hosting her Oscar Pool. Normally, I love these things -- and usually do very well. I had a winning streak going for about three years straight in the late '90s BW = Before Will.

But this year, I'm at a bit of a loss, not having seen ANY -- I repeat, ANY -- of the major films or performances. There was a time when this would have been considered heresy in my world -- I was a movie-going machine, making sure I saw anything and everything that was worth seeing when it came out. Sometimes with a pal or group; sometimes all by myself. A Saturday afternoon solo double feature was one of my guilty pleasures.

Not no 'mo. Motherhood and grown-up hood and other assorted hoods have precluded my attendance at the cinema. Cannot remember the last time I saw a movie in a theatre.

Thus my predicament. I've read all about the films in question and the performances up for debate. But reading is not the same as seeing.

So... I'm looking for suggestions to help me at least make a decent showing in this pool.

Here's a list of the biggie categories, with my current choice indicated in the bold italics. Any and all help would be appreciated.

DON'T BE SHY ABOUT POSTING! Please!!!

My pop culture goddess status is at stake here. And that's my most prized cred. At the moment.

~~~~~~~~~~

Best motion picture of the year
"Atonement"
"Juno"
"Michael Clayton"
“No Country for Old Men"
"There Will Be Blood"

Performance by an actor in a leading role
George Clooney in "Michael Clayton"
Daniel Day-Lewis in "There Will Be Blood"
Johnny Depp in "Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street"
Tommy Lee Jones in "In the Valley of Elah"
Viggo Mortensen in "Eastern Promises"

Performance by an actor in a supporting role
Casey Affleck in "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford"
Javier Bardem in "No Country for Old Men"
Philip Seymour Hoffman in "Charlie Wilson's War"
Hal Holbrook in "Into the Wild"
Tom Wilkinson in "Michael Clayton"
(note: Bardem is the safe bet, but I'd love to see Hal Holbrook walk away with this...)

Performance by an actress in a leading role
Cate Blanchett in "Elizabeth: The Golden Age"
Julie Christie in "Away from Her"
Marion Cotillard in "La Vie en Rose"
Laura Linney in "The Savages"
Ellen Page in "Juno"

Performance by an actress in a supporting role
Cate Blanchett in "I'm Not There"
Ruby Dee in "American Gangster"
Saoirse Ronan in "Atonement"
Amy Ryan in "Gone Baby Gone"
Tilda Swinton in "Michael Clayton"

Best animated feature film of the year
"Persepolis" : Marjane Satrapi and Vincent Paronnaud
"Ratatouille" : Brad Bird
"Surf's Up" : Ash Brannon and Chris Buck

Achievement in directing
"The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" , Julian Schnabel
"Juno”, Jason Reitman
"Michael Clayton" , Tony Gilroy
"No Country for Old Men" , Joel Coen and Ethan Coen
"There Will Be Blood" , Paul Thomas Anderson

Best foreign language film of the year
"Beaufort" Israel
"The Counterfeiters" Austria
"Katyn" Poland
"Mongol" Kazakhstan
"12" Russia

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original score)
"Atonement" Dario Marianelli
"The Kite Runner" : Alberto Iglesias
"Michael Clayton" James Newton Howard
"Ratatouille" Michael Giacchino
"3:10 to Yuma" Marco Beltrami

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original song)
"Falling Slowly" from "Once" Music and Lyric by Glen Hansard and: Marketa Irglova
"Happy Working Song" from "Enchanted" : Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz
"Raise It Up" from "August Rush" : Nominees to be determined
"So Close" from "Enchanted" : Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz
"That's How You Know" from "Enchanted" : Music by Alan Menken; Lyric by Stephen Schwartz

Adapted screenplay
"Atonement" , Screenplay by Christopher Hampton
"Away from Her" , Written by Sarah Polley
"The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" , Screenplay by Ronald Harwood
"No Country for Old Men" Written for the screen by Joel Coen & Ethan Coen
"There Will Be Blood" , Written for the screen by Paul Thomas Anderson

Original screenplay
"Juno" Written by Diablo Cody
"Lars and the Real Girl" Written by Nancy Oliver
"Michael Clayton" , Written by Tony Gilroy
"Ratatouille" , Screenplay by Brad Bird; Story by Jan Pinkava, Jim Capobianco, Brad Bird
"The Savages" Written by Tamara Jenkins

29 Levels of Moi!

Straight from Urban Dictionary...

meme
4 : in blogspeak, an idea that is spread from blog to blog

5 : an internet information generator, especially of random or contentless information

~~~~~~

So I poached this meme from some very savvy cool person's blog -- damned if I can't remember from exactly where. It's been sitting in draft form around here for a while and I just decided it was time to move it from draft to first class post status.

I'm not sure what the significance of the 29 Levels is in this meme -- do you reach some sort of higher level of consciousness by Level 29 or are you just rewarded for making it all the way through the damn thing. I tinkered with this just a bit -- there were a couple of mentions about Facebook and since that's not my bag (too damn old, I think), I tailored things to make them more age appropriate. Anyway -- try it yourself. But be honest -- I was. Promise.

Please feel free to poach this for your own blog -- monkey see, monkey do and all that jazz...

~~~~~~

Level 1
(x) Smoked a cigarette.
( ) Smoked a cigar.
( ) Kissed a member of the same sex.
(x) Drank alcohol.

Level 2
(x) Are/been in love.
(x) Been dumped.
( ) Shoplifted.
(x) Been fired.
( ) Been in a fist fight.

Level 3
(x) Had a crush on an older person.
(x) Skipped school.
(x) Slept with a classmate.
(x) Seen someone/something die.

Level 4
(x) Had/have a unrequited crush on one of your friends.
( ) Been to Paris.
( ) Been to Spain.
(x) Been on a plane.
(x) Thrown up from drinking.

Level 5
( ) Eaten sushi.
( ) Been snowboarding.
( ) Met/dated someone online.
(X) Been in a mosh pit.

Level 6
( ) Been in an abusive relationship.
(x) Taken pain killers.
(x) Love/loved someone who you can’t have.
(x) Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by.
(x) Made a snow angel.

Level 7
(x) Had a tea party.
(x) Flown a kite.
(x) Built a sand castle.
(x) Gone mudding (offroading).
(x) Played dress up.

Level 8
( ) Jumped into a pile of leaves.
( ) Gone sledging.
(x) Cheated while playing a game.
(x) Been lonely.
(x) Fallen asleep at work/school.

Level 9
(x) Watched the sun set.
( ) Felt an earthquake.
( ) Killed a snake.

Level 10
(x) Been tickled.
(x) Been robbed/vandalized.
(x) Been cheated on.
(x) Been misunderstood.

Level 11
(x) Won a contest.
( ) Been suspended from school.
( )Had detention.
(x) Been in a car/motorcycle accident.

Level 12
(x) Had/have braces.
(x) Eaten a whole pint of ice cream in one night.
(x) Danced in the moonlight.

Level 13
(x) Hated the way you look.
(x) Witnessed a crime.
( ) Pole danced.
(x) Questioned your heart.
( ) Been obsessed with post-it-notes.

Level 14
(x) Squished barefoot through the mud.
(x) Been lost.
( ) Been to the opposite side of the world.
(x) Swam in the ocean.
( ) Felt like you were dying.

Level 15
(x) Cried yourself to sleep.
( ) Played cops and robbers.
(x) Recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers.
(x) Sang karaoke.
(x) Paid for a meal with only coins.

Level 16
(x) Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t.
(x) Made prank phone calls.
(x) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose.
(x) Kissed in the rain.

Level 17
(x) Written a letter to Santa Claus.
(x) Watched the sun set/sun rise with someone you care/cared about.
(x) Blown bubbles.
(x) Made a bonfire on the beach or anywhere.

Level 18
(x) Crashed A Party.
( ) Have travelled more than 5 days with a car full of people.
(x) Gone rollerskating/blading.
(x) Had a wish come true.
( ) Slept with a member of the same sex.

Level 19
(x) Worn pearls.
( ) Jumped off a bridge.
(x) Screamed “penis” or “vagina”.
(x) Swam with dolphins.

Level 20
( ) Got your tongue stuck to a pole/freezer/ice cube.
( ) Kissed a fish.
(x) Worn the opposite sex’s clothes.
(x) Sat on a roof top.

Level 21
(x) Screamed at the top of your lungs.
( ) Done/attempted a one-handed cartwheel.
(x) Talked on the phone for more than six hours (in one day).
(x) Recently stayed up for a while talking to someone you care about.

Level 22
( ) Picked and ate an apple right off the tree.
(x) Climbed a tree.
(x) Had/been in a tree house.
( ) Been scared to watch scary movies alone.

Level 23
(x) Believed in ghosts.
(x) Have had more than thirty pairs of shoes (not necessarily all at once).
( ) Gone streaking.
( ) Visited jail.

Level 24
( ) Played chicken.
(x) Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on.
(x) Been told you’re hot by a complete stranger.
( ) Broken a bone.
(x) Been easily amused.

Level 25
(x) Caught a fish then ate it later.
( ) Made a porn video.
( ) Caught a butterfly.
(x) Laughed so hard you cried.
(x) Cried so hard you laughed.

Level 26
(x) Mooned/flashed someone.
(x) Had someone moon/flash you.
(x) Cheated on a test.
(x) Forgotten someone’s name.
(x) French braided someone’s hair.
(x) Gone skinny dipping.
( ) Been kicked out of your house.
( ) Tried to hurt yourself.

Level 27
(x) Rode a roller coaster.
(x) Went scuba-diving/snorkelling.
(x) Had a cavity.
( ) Black-mailed someone.
( ) Been black-mailed.

Level 28
(x) Been used.
(x) Fell going up the stairs.
( ) Licked a cat.
( ) Bitten someone.
(x) Licked someone.

Level 29
( ) Been shot at/or at gunpoint.
(x) Had sex in the rain.
( ) Flattened someone’s tires.
(x) Drove your car/truck until the gas light came on.
(x) Got five dollars or less worth of gas.

~~~~~~
Huh. Looks like I have lived a life after all. Whatdaya know.

What must she think about "muffin tops?"

Sent to me by my always hilarious brother...

Pop Culturista

In case you didn't know, I love TV. The fact that the writers' strike seems to be over is making me giddy with delight.

But... I have a really soft spot for classic TV, especially sitcoms. TV Land and I are likethis.

And... in case you didn't know, I have a HUGE appreciation for camp. Flamboyance. Over-the-top. It's for me.

These pieces, by artist Isabel Samaras cover both of those bases. (Warning: some of the pieces on her site are NSFW --Not Safe For Work-- or for young eyes.)

And on a day like today, when it's raining and I've got a case of the Blues and Will has been a terror both at home (throwing tantrums!) and at school (sent to time out!) and I have to be peppy and energetic for my pre-school choir in a couple of hours when all I want to do is stay home and cry and pull a blanket over my head, these are a welcome respite.

Miss Grant on the Half-Shell


From MJ's Joan of Arc period

Sergeant-at-Arms Herman

I Can't Help Myself

Urban Dictionary's Term of the Day:

UDI: Unidentified Drinking Injury

When one is drunk, one picks up random bruises, aches and pains. At worst, cuts and bruises too.

I'm pretty sure I broke a finger playing cards last night. wtf.





I'll tell you about my UDIs if you tell me about yours.

You go first.

Oh-Wee-Oh-Wee-Oh!

Highlight of last night's Grammy Awards:



The Time! Morris Day! EEEEEEEEE!

...I, I've been watching you. I think I wanna know ya.
Said I, I'm a little dangerous. Girl, I'd love to show ya.

My jungle love, yeah. I think I wanna know ya.
Jungle love. Girl, I'd love to show ya.

You, you've got a pretty car. I think I wanna drive it.
I ain't playin', said I drive a little dangerous. Take you to my crib, rip you off.

My jungle love, yeah. I think I wanna know ya.
Jungle love. Girl, I'd love to show ya.

Come on baby, where's your guts? You wanna make love or what?

I wanna take you to my cage, lock you up and hide the key.
You only get water, baby. Cuz if you're hungry, take a bite of me....

Love this song. EEEEEEEEEEE!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Herbie Hancock? Really? Seriously? Over Kanye and Miss Winehouse?

You sure it wasn't Marissa Tomei?

I did read in some wire report that this is the first instrumental jazz album to receive Album of the Year honors since my beloved Getz/Gilberto back in the '60s. It was mentioned on another blog/message board that I frequent that perhaps the Grammy voters used this as a way to honor (just as Mr. Hancock alluded to in his acceptance speech) the jazz greats of the past -- Miles, Coltrane, Parker, Baker. Personally, I wouldn't give them that much credit, but it's perhaps a lovely byproduct to have some focus tossed on the genre as a whole..

I haven't heard Mr. Hancock's album, so I really can't speak to its merits one way or the other. But in a world where jazz is marginalized and often flies in the bunker below the radar, it's a very unusual choice when compared with more mainstream and yes, commercial options like Kanye or Winehouse or Foo. Now that the JazzFanGirl in me is awake and functioning, and the initial shock has worn off over this "upset" we're both hoping that this out-of-left-field win might bring some much-deserved attention to the amazing American art form that is jazz.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fun Quote of the Night, courtesy of Vince Gill:
"I just had an award handed to me by a Beatle. Have you had that happen yet, Kanye?”

Awesome Quote of the Night, also courtesy of Vince Gill:
"Music is the real place where democracy lives -- every note is equal."

JINX! You Owe Me a Coke.

My personal favorite Super Bowl ad (along with the Pepsi/Deaf Actors one):



FYI: James Carville is my political boyfriend.

Shut. Up.

BTW: The list of my celebrity boyfriends includes the following:
George Clooney/Movies
Alec Baldwin/TV
Stewart Copeland/Music
John Lynch/Football (best ass in the NFL)
Raúl Esparza/Theatre

I'm nothing if not diverse with my taste and affections.

Super Bowling

As far as I'm concerned, the holiday season officially ends tomorrow.

With Super Bowl Sunday.

A football game has turned into a spectacle of epic proportions. If the game were played on a weekday, I suspect there would have been some act of Congress declaring the day of the event to be a national holiday.

Are you ready for some football -- the last football we'll see until late summer?

I am.

It's no secret that I am a sports aficionado of the highest magnitude. Especially football, both college (GO GATORS!) and pro. And basketball (GO CELTICS!). And sometimes baseball. Oh, and the Olympics (coming to us this summer...) Tennis, too. Golf -- not so much. Except for the major tournaments. Never NASCAR...zzzzzzzzzzzzz. And while hockey's fun, I don't follow it like I should.

See what I mean. Love. It.

I don't really have a favorite in the game tomorrow --even though I have a little crush on Michael Strahan. I just want to see a good, competitive 60 minutes on the field. And a fairly interesting halftime show. My Gainesville boys Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers are playing -- excellent. No chance for a wardrobe malfunction with these guys -- at least not an intentional one. *crosses fingers*

The game, halftime show and a little pre-and-post commentary would be enough to make me a happy sports-lovin' girl.

But the programming geniuses at Fox don't necessarily agree. New to their 21-hour-coverage of the game: a red carpet feature. Hosted by Ryan Seacrest.

WTF?

Now, I'm as big a fan of red carpet shenanigans as the next awards-show junkie. They're just part of the fabric of those events. I'm happy to settle in at 6 o'clock on Oscar night to see who's wearing what and why and how. If you think about it, that is a sporting event of a different feather. Marabou feathers, to be more exact.

But... why do I want or need to see Seacrest chatting up people going to a bloody football game? Seriously.

I mentioned this fact on one of my web playgrounds: Pop Life, a blog helmed by Sean Daly, pop music critic for the St. Petersburg Times. One of my blog buddies, a very witty fellow who calls himself Jeff in Cuba, provided the perfect commentary:

Red carpet at the Super Bowl? How is that going to work?

Ryan: Oh look, here comes New Jersey janitor, and longtime Giants fan, Joey Bartolo!

Joey: Wassup?

Ryan: I've got to tell you Joey, you look great. Who are you wearing?

Joey: Uh,... I think this a Hanes Beefy T.

Ryan: And I see you've got your inflatable "Thunder Sticks".
We're seeing a lot of those on the red carpet this year; they're the new "Foam Finger".

Joey: Yeah, whatever.

Ryan: And what's that on your lapel? Is that Versace?

Joey: No, I think it's salsa...

Check out Jeff's post in context.

Trainwreck or surprising success? I'll be the judge. Probably right about this time tomorrow.

ETA: Here's a Sports Illustrated.com piece on the Fox coverage. Lots of information about the who and what and yes, the why. Best tidbit: My TV Husband Alec Baldwin is the narrator the Road to the Super Bowl piece. His dulcet tones describing football... I'm so there. Rowr.

One more thing... here's a sneaky-peak at a commercial that'll run during the game. If it doesn't make you smile, then I'll eat my hat. With cheese sauce on it. Washed down with a beer. Maybe alongside some chips. And salsa.