Resolutions, Smesholutions

Tick.

Father Time is getting ready to do whatever it is he does every 365 days (or 366, depending on that Leap Year thing.) Flip the calendar over. Change the Baby New Year. All that stuff. I'd make a "Turn the Page" reference here, but I LOATHE Bob Seger with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. So not.

It's 2008. Almost. Where the hell did the time go? Across my forehead and up through my roots, for one thing.

Tradition and stereotypes and the media all point to the fact that it's time to make those self-improvement goals known as resolutions. You can't turn on the tube without catching a Jenny Craig/Slim Fast/NutriSystem(Booyah!)/Weight Watchers commercial. Glad I jumped on that bandwagon early. (PS: It's working. Had to buy a size-smaller pair of jeans the other day. And the food's actually not all that bad. What there is of it, anyway. Fucking portion control -- I'll get you, my pretty. And your soy protein too. Although I did have to slow the diet train down for a detour over Christmas. Mostly for the booze. Holiday Cheer and all.)

Tick. Tick.

I'm going to be ringing in the New Year on a boat somewhere in the Caribbean somewhere between Key West and Belize. No, I'm not escaping from Cuba -- gonna be on a cruise. Grownups only. The upside to that is that I just have to navigate walking from the watering hole to our cabin. No need to worry about a designated driver. Downside: don't know whether or not the ship will have satellite hookups for all the New Year's Day games. (The Gators kick off at 1pm Eastern...)

Anyhoo -- my impending trip has triggered me to think about such things as New Year's resolutions earlier than usual. Which is better than not at all, I suppose.

But -- rather than committing to a list of literal, tangible commitments (those are so damn intimidating, don't you think), I'm going more theoretical with my goals and objectives for the coming year. Gives me room to play and less potential for crashing and burning.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

I'm going to make a point of taking better care of myself -- physically, emotionally and creatively. Got a head-start on the physical aspect with the jump-start of the diet and the joining of the YMCA. Wanted to beat that first week of January rush. This also will most likely involve being more organized, especially around the house. Cleaning closets, cleaning files, cleaning behind the refrigerator. I think if the recesses of my 1200 square foot house (yes, you read that correctly) have some serious structure, then the recesses of my mind will be a bit calmer as well. I also want to write more -- whether that be here on my silly little blog or on one of the zillion possible projects I have kicking around in my head or whatever. Putting word to virtual paper is one of the best methods of catharsis I have. Always has been. It's good for the brain. It's good for my soul.

I could be noble and say that I also want to read more and to read a better quality of book, but who am I kidding -- I just pre-ordered Jackie Collins' next book on Amazon. It should be in my little fat hands in time for our annual week in Captiva. Also in the realm of the ridiculous is trying to watch less TV. Not. Gonna. Happen. So why even try. Chalk one up for self- awareness.


And there you have it. My theoretical objectives for the New Year. I'll keep you posted on how things are going (see, I'm already taking that 'writing more' one to heart.) Auld lang syne and all that good stuff.

Tick. Tick. Tick.

Boom!

Here we go...