The Drying Game

Ah summer -- the time when a young man's fancy turns to mischief. And so it has been the case here with young William, who has found very creative ways to assuage the boredom of the last hot days before the advent of a new school year.

He is obsessed with the dryer. Our front-loading, state-of-the-art dryer. Making it spin, usually on turbo high. Changing the settings, which is more about pushing the buttons than anything. And putting things other than clothes in, just for the fun of it. For the sound of it.

Grrrrrrrrrrr.

There go the whites
Mmm, getting whiter
There go the colors
Getting brighter

He likes the washing machine, too. That one's fun because after pushing a combination of buttons only Will knows about, he can flood the laundry room floor with a plethora of soap suds. It's like we're having our own foam party. The first time he did it, I took pictures and sent them to the Mister, who was, as usual, working at a client site for the week. I could hear the suppressed laughter all the way from West Palm Beach. The second time he did it, the Mister was home. Interesting how it was funnier the first time Will made this happen.

Anyhoo.

I must mention that for the most part, Will's access to the laundry room is restricted. The Mister drilled a hole at the top where we put a dowel to "lock" the sliding pocket door. Most of the dryer antics occurred before this measure was taken. We're slow on the uptake sometimes, Will's parents...

There go the delicates
Through the final rinse
There goes my Saturday night
I go without a fight

Without further ado, I give you a list of Things Will Has Put in the Dryer. For your amusement and for my attempt to regain some sanity. Seeing it all on paper might help.

• Hangers

• Shoes. Usually mine.

• A roll of paper towels. It was a passel of paper towels and a crushed towel tube by the time I got to it.

• Television remote control. That was fun, since the TV was stuck on Disney Channel until I could find it.

• Various toys

• Several rolls of aluminum foil, parchment paper, etc.

• A box of AeroGarden seed pods. Yes, I have an AeroGarden. My complete inability to grow anything in the plant world sort of necessitated it. This is the only way I can grow herbs, since it's pretty much fool-proof. And Janey-proof. Hush.

• Kleenex box cover. BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG

• A set of magnetized letters from the refrigerator. Those were fun to get out of the metal dryer. I invented some new yoga moves getting them off the top of the drum.

• A bottle of Tide. That's right. Laundry detergent in the dryer. Fortunately it wasn't a full bottle. And I am rather proud of how I figured out how to clean it up. (Wet towels on air fluff, no heat. Wash towels and repeat. Worked like a charm.) I'm thinking of using it as my audition piece to be the next Hints from Heloise.

I'm not sure why he's so fascinated with these big loud machines. He has similar affection for the dishwasher. Where his belt -- his leather, braided school belt -- has gone through a cycle or two before. I keep telling myself it's a great occupational therapy thing that he can get his belt off as I hang it up to dry. Always look on the bright side of life and all that jazz.

While all these antics are crazy and keep me on my toes, I rather embrace them. Boys are going to make mischief - and it's refreshing to have to maneuver around things that aren't special-needs or health-related. This is some standard-issue-boy-stuff. How wonderful.

School starts Monday. The dryer and I are very happy about that.

Watching the clothes go 'round
Watching the clothes go 'round
Watching the clothes go 'round
Watching the clothes go 'round