Love, love, love this meme. Y'all can thank my girlie CajunVegan for bringing this little gem to my attention. And read carefully -- there are a couple of new revelations about me tucked in here. Just when you thought you had me all figured out, too...TEN things you wish you could say to TEN different people right now:
1. Whatchu talkin’ about, Willis?
2. Bite. Me.
3. Enough already. You exhaust me.
4. I don’t give a rat’s ass about your latest issue. Get over it.
5. You are beautiful.
6. Thank you.
7. You hurt me more than you will ever know.
8. I miss you. Terribly.
9. How you doin’ (to be read in the style of Joey Tribiani)
10. What’s new, pussycat?
NINE things about yourself:
1. I cannot remember what my natural hair color is.
2. Three quarters of my wardrobe is black.
3. If it weren’t for the fact that I never had dance lessons as a child, I would be a STAH on Broadway today.*
* This statement is the opinion of the author and does not necessarily reflect any actuality whatsoever.
4. I once tried to pierce a guy’s ear with an icepick and rubbing alcohol.
Yes, we were under the influence. Why do you ask?
5. I am going to attempt to make homemade pie crusts for the first time ever for my Thanksgiving desserts.
6. I have double jointed pinkys.
7. There are 17 pairs of shoes under my desk right now.
8. I like my meat rare and my fish back in the ocean where it belongs.
9. I cannot believe I'm about to share this... I. Was a debutante.
SHUT UP. NOW.
EIGHT ways to win your heart:
1. Make me think.
2. Make me laugh.
3. Make me think again.
4. Banter wittily with me.
5. Quote me “This is Spinal Tap” or “So I Married an Axe Murderer.”
6. Play Nick to my Nora.
7. Quote (or, even better, sing) Cole Porter.
8. Keep making me think. And laugh.
Oh -- and talk sports with me. And not just surface level stuff, either. Baby, I read espn.com and sportsillustrated.com every. single. day.
SEVEN things that cross your mind a lot:
1. Where in the hell are my keys?
2. Do I have enough time to take a nap?
3. Chick-fil-A. Evil. Chick-fil-A. Evil. Chick-fil-A. Evil.
(I figure if I say it enough, I might actually start listening... oh Number One with a sweet tea and extra ketchup and mayo, why do I love you so)
4. Shall I use my powers for good or for evil today...
5. Awww crap.
6. Should I wear the Apple Bottom jeans and the boots with the fur or something else...
7. Damn, do I hate underwires.
SIX things you do before you fall asleep:
1. Cleanse.
2. Moisturize. Everything.
3. Take my pills.
4. Brush.
5. Check on Will.
6. Set the TV Sleep timer.
FIVE people you couldn’t live without:
1. Mr. Clooney
2. Mr. Baldwin (Alec)
3. Mr. Copeland
(as in Stewart, drummer for The Police. If you’re new here, you might not be aware of my long-standing devotion to him...)
4. Mr. Hamm
(Jon, aka Don Draper of Mad Men fame)
5. Mr. Malkovich
FOUR things you’re wearing right now:
1. Reading glasses
2. Pajama top
3. Bed head
4. A thoughtful demeanor
THREE songs that fit your life perfectly:
1. “Jane’s Getting Serious” - Jon Astley
2. “Too Darn Hot” - Cole Porter
3. “Amazing Grace”
TWO things you want to do before you die:
1. Go to South America.
2. Be published.
ONE confession:
I lost my virginity underneath a Christmas tree.
Go ahead. Top THAT one, y’all...
PS: Don't forget to leave a little love in the comments in order to keep playin' our Big! Holiday! Fun! blog contest,'kay!
